I really hate this. Not this as in life, or this as in my day-to-day, this as in this moment, right now. Right when my eyes feel like blinking doesn't help, and when my ears want to stop hearing things, and when I just want to slip into some sort of cocoon-like middle stage, where I can get past all the B.S. of being a teenager, all the superficial crap, all the insecurity, all the stupid-arse drama, and romance, and complications. But even when I think that I know that I can't just sleep through it, that this is for the rest of my life. People will always be superficial and insecure and people will always thrive on drama. It's those thoughts that make me want to go live in mountains for the rest of my life. Get a motor home or a camper or something, and just go find a spot that's secluded, and live away from all the stupidity of life. Like my Dad did, after the divorce. I'll go move to montana, stay up in the mountains for the summer, as long as I can chance it, then for the winter just board with some cool hippies or something. Just lay low and avoid people who would just cause me pain or frustration or whatever. I could find a tiny little run-down cabin and fix it up. Devote my time to my arts. I'd sell my stuff in town to make some money, but I'd be self-efficient for the most part. I'd go climb up a mountain, I even know the trail, and I'd sing at the peak, I'd sing with all my heart, and people down below would hear me, and maybe stop their angry lives, their selfish lives, their sad lives, to listen. Maybe I'd come down from the mountain, and live in the town, find someone to spend the rest of my days with, settle down and live life happily. I even know the house I'd live in. I've been inside. It's perfect and beautiful. I'd grow old, and happy and I'd die, knowing that I got away from some of the shit people do, some of the crap we think is normal. I'd die with a smile on my face, but not before sharing my story with someone. Someone young like me in this moment, someone lost and frustrated. I'd tell them about my cabin and the mountaintop. Maybe one day after I'd be dead and gone, that person would climb up a mountain to find my cabin, they'd devote them self to whatever they love, they'd climb to a mountain peak, and they too would sing for all the people down below to hear and think, and maybe for one moment, stop and just listen.

I can only wish.

Back to the Old Routine.

Well I got home a few days ago, and while it's great to be out of the stifling heat and humidity, I am kindof disappointed at going back to my old "routines." You know, wake up, wander about the house, get on the compy, eat, wander, get on the compy, wander, fiddle with stuff in my room, get on the compy and so on. At least I did some stuff visiting my dad. The only thing exciting  that I've done is go to the local Art Museum with Kendra and her friend Trisha for her (Kendra's) birthday. Which was pretty fun, I was glad to see some of my friends again. I had to wait outside the museum for about an hour and half though, waiting for everyone to arrive. And of course the place has two main entrances which was FFFFFFFFFF-tastic. Pretty much I just walked between the two the entire time. I think the museum guard people were confused by the time I was making my third pass. But, Kendra and Trisha did show up, and I didn't get assaulted by this creepy hobo ventriloquist. I am not even kidding about the hobo ventriloquist. It was one of the oddest things I've seen. And I've seen many, many street performers.

Well, I guess I should tell you all about what I did at my Daaaads. I went and saw a foreign film, called "I am Love" it was interesting, though it was a teensy bit hard to follow. Also, there was a sex scene in the middle. Considering my dad was sitting next to me... it was pretty damn awkward. Uhm we also went and saw a bluegrass show, at the Ryman. I can't remember who played, but he's a legend pretty much. He plays the Banjo. Then we went to the Aquarium, which was pretty awesome. They had a Jelly-fish exhibit. (I don't care what you're supposed to call them, I call them jelly-fish) That was pretty much awesome. I absolutely love looking at jelly fish. They're both beautiful and silly. and the displays they had were really well done. They had a dark room with a full wall of moon Jellies and mirrors on each side, it made it seem like there was a never ending hall of Jellies. Sadly there were a lot of poorly controlled kids in the room... FFFFFF SMALL CHILDREN. They also had a seahorse exhibit. I was so excited to see the Sea-dragons, I really adore them. Uhm... we also saw an IMAX film. The srs bsns kind too, not the lame-tastic movie version of IMAX. The full on museum-grade IMAX where the screen talks to you in the beginning and the screen is SIX STORIES TALL. FUCK YES IMAX! :3 It was also 3D. The film was about the Hubble Telescope. It was pretty nifty, to say the least.

But I guess that's about it. Herp Derp. I think I'm going to go wander for a bit, and maybe eat something. 

~Tentacle Cat says: Full Circle!!!

Hooray planes...

Well I'm off to my dad's soon, hoorah. I really am glad I get to see him and my step-family, but it was just poorly timed. There are some things that I wanted to do that I won't be able to now that I'll be away. All because my mom suddenly cares if she leaves Jordan and I to fend for ourselves for a while. Seriously, it's like she's gotten more protective with age. She normally does the minimal of parental overseeing, but now she's actually slightly engaged. Maybe it's because Jordan's going off to College, she having an "OMG I DIDN'T PARENT MY CHILDREN ENOUGH MAYBE IF I START NOW IT'LL BE OKAY" moment. Guh, I'm sorry I really don't mean to sound that bitchy, but my mom can get on my nerves from time to time.

Blurg, teenage angst aside I guess not much is going on. Though I did see Despicable Me today. It was pretty much adorable, and really there was nothing sad in it. Generally a pretty fantastic movie. Go see it. :3

My Old Compy!!!!

So, I dunno if I ever mentioned this (I've probably bitched about it at some point or another) But I've been using my mum's Mac book for a really long time now. Like months or something, all because the big desktop compy decided that I should never log in again EVAR! Now her boyfriend at the time (Who claimed to know about computers) said that I should under no circumstances just create a new account and transfer over all my crap. Something about "Wull that hardly fixes the problum huurrrrrr." My mum would not listen to me when I said I could just make a new account. Now, time has passed, and my mum has a new boyfriend who said that this sort of thing happens all the time with the software at his work and they just... make a new account and move their stuff. CONCEPT! And now I really feel like telling my mum "I told ya' so!" But I won't because I'm a pansy-ass.
So, long story short, I now have access to my old compy all the time and will never again have to wait for my mum to get off her lap-top. Also, my my firefox has a Cain skin (From God Child) Fuck yes. My compy is awash with sexy men. (I have a a young Vladmire from the web comic Bardiflay on my desk-top)
I will need the consolation of sexy men in the near future too. I'm pretty set on breaking up with Alex. (Lol, where'd that come from?) Our relationship started going places I realize I didn't really want to go, and I'm not good with patching things up or whatever. I have a nagging feeling that I'm taking the easy way out, but then I think of all the stuff that I don't like about him. The top few are: He does drugs, He kisses like a dog and has rank breath (those are related), He doesn't read, and he can be jerk without meaning it. Guh back into the turmoil of relationships. This wouldn't be to much of a problem though, if I could figure out a way to break up with him that isn't too awkward or shitty on my part. Sadly I don't have school to use as a way to meet. I'll just have to "stop by" or whatever. Maybe after I get back from visiting my dad. Or before? Which is less brood-inducing? Blurg I dunno, on to cooler stuff.
I found yet another web-comic, but this one is pretty much the longest comic I've ever read. I started reading it a few days ago and I just today got to the year 2009. But it's a really awesome comic, so I'm akoy with it. It's called Questionable Content. I actually have a whole slew of comics that I need to put on the list... but I'm lazy so I haven't gotten around to it ever. Derp. Sorry.
I've also been getting a lot of comic ideas in my head. I just need to sit down and draw them... lol one's about me falling on my arse when practicing "Parkour" with Kelsey X3 I'm still sore from all that physical activity.
And I guess the only other news is that... uhm... I will hopefully be ordering my catsuit before I go to my dad's and that Drag U is premiering while I'm there. I'm going to make my step-brothers watch it XD


~Tentacle cats are Parkour BEASTS.

I need to sleep more...

Well, I knew it would happen, but I didn't know it would suck so much. My body has lapsed into it's new (by new I mean it's only happened the past few summers) "Summer Time" Sleeping schedule. This consists of me staying up until sometime between 3 and 5, then sleeping in until anywhere from 12 to 1 or later at times. This I wouldn't mind so much, if it weren't so hard to break. I mean, I'm getting more sleep than I normally do during the school year, and when I am up, I feel fine. But if I have to get up even an hour earlier than normal, it is the biggest bitch in the existence of the universe. (Give or take, of course) I've even started out-staying-up Alex. Which is sad, because I get lonely in the wee hours of the morning with no-one to talk to.
Oh, so, happy 4th of July to anyone who celebrates that. I myself went up to my grandma's to see my cousins and watch fire-works. Really the whole affair was uncomfortable. I don't do well around my mum's side of the family. Our whole little group or whatever is already a black sheep from the rest of the family where my grandma is, but then I'm about the black-sheepiest of the lot, compared to the rest of them at least. Though my brother does have that whole gender-queer thing going for him, but everyone likes my brother because he's a really likable person. I however have a bitch of a time because, despite being a very openly eccentric person, (aka I dress like a freak and draw stuff that looks like I was on acid) I am still really self-concious. And in this lovely little town, you are either a college student, in 4H, or you play a sport. If you don't apply to those categories, you certainly don't show it off. I was wearing my outfit that reminds me of 1800's school girl outfits. Or at least Sadako's in Yu+Me. Though I don't have an adorable Apron to go with it like she does. D: But anyway, I was wearing that, and everyone else was wearing jeans and t-shirts or what have you, and the my cousins come over wearing more normal clothes, and they were obviously leery of me. Then, lo and behold, friends of theirs join us. I was so very uncomfortable I felt like I would explode. I think I was able to contribute to the conversation a bit, enough so they didn't think I was a mute too. But, a storm came along so we went back to my grandma's and it was just my cousins again. That was more manageable, plus my mum's new boyfriend is a rather nice chap, and I talked with him a bit. While he doesn't know much about anything I like, he would still listen and ask questions and offer up what he did know. My mum had been saying he only talks about himself, and never allowed for other conversation. She must either not be good at having conversations, or doesn't know how to sit back and listen to someone talk.

Oh well, I shall cut off my rambling here, and try to go to sleep. Derp, so tired


~Tentacle Cats love school girls.